The Meddler (0/10)

by Tony Medley

Runtime 100 minutes.

Not for children.

First the good news. This does, in fact, end. While you might feel that you are trapped inside one of the new lasers on a 20 year trip to our nearest star, Alpha Centauri, and that there is no end in sight, that is an illusion created by a contrived, politically correct story and some really dismal acting and directing. And, contrary to what you might feel as you are sitting there entombed with this film in a darkened theater, you will not die of boredom. I am living, breathing evidence that survival is possible.

Now the bad news. I’ve seen a lot of chick flicks, and this is certainly near the bottom of the barrel. I saw it with a chick and even she hated it. I was reluctant to suggest to her that we bail after the first half hour because I thought maybe she was enjoying it, but when I told her as we left the screening that I was ready to leave a long time ago, she said she would have gladly departed. However, we both emerged relatively unscathed.

The flimsy story, written and directed by Lorene Scafaria, is that Marnie Minervini (Susan Sarandon) is a widow who is forever meddling in other people’s affairs, a do-gooder who spends money on others, even strangers,  when they need it. Sometime during the film she meets Zipper (J.K. Simmons). He’s the only good thing in the movie but he is in it so little that he probably wasn’t on the set more than a week, if that.

Apart from Mr. Simmons, there was one other thing I liked about the movie, and that’s the voice of Juice Newton singing “Angel of the Morning” near the end.

Well, there is something else that’s not too bad about the movie, too. Susan has claimed for years that she has the best breasts in Hollywood and near the end of the film she wears a red dress that shows she’s still got ‘em.

But they weren’t worth the wait.