Avengers: Age of Ultron (1/10)
by Tony Medley
Runtime 141 minutes.
OK for children.
When this finally ended I had an appreciation for how it feels to be
unjustly convicted of a crime, sentenced to prison for life, and be
released after 10 years when it was discovered you were not guilty.
Sure, it feels good to be free, but who’s going to give you back your
time?
This is true Hollywood garbage. It’s a film with no plot, no acting,
virtually no script, and no raison d’ être except to make money. The
actors who participate, specifically Robert Downey Jr., Scarlett
Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Jeremy Renner, and Samuel L Jackson, are all
A-list stars. They are accompanied by other fine actors like Chris
Hemsworth, Chris Evans, James Spader (who plays the new villain, Ultron,
an artificial intelligence creation of Downey’s, in a motion capture
suit), and Don Cheadle. They desecrate their God-given talent by
participating in such a mockery. Their exceptional talents add nothing,
zero, zilch, nada, to what is nothing more than a special effects-laden
mishmash of ridiculous, unending fights among characters who never
suffer any effects from the brutal encounters. I could be cast as Iron
Man in place of Robert Downey Jr. (or, for that matter, as Black Widow
in place of Scarlett Johansson) without detracting one iota from the
quality of the movie or its appeal to its target audience.
It’s a cartoon based on
cartoons, agony to sit through almost 2 ½ hours. It’s not interesting,
tense, exciting, funny, romantic, or anything else that is required for
entertainment. It’s a sad commentary on the viewing public that this
movie that cost a quarter of a billion dollars to make will undoubtedly
rake in a fortune in profits at the box office.
I didn’t think I would see a worse major studio movie than Furious 7
(which has topped the box office for four weeks in a row), but this
movie proved me wrong. But as long as the target audience seems to be
teenage boys still marveling at the wonder of their first orgasm, and as
long as these movies make a ton of money, they will continue to be made.
I have to see them because it’s my job. Fortunately for you, however,
you don’t.
If you want to see a good movie about artificial intelligence, avoid
this and go see Ex Machina.
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