Magic Mike
(1/10)
by Tony Medley
Runtime 110
minutes.
Not for
children.
A-G-0-N-Y. That's
how I spell this 110 minutes. A story of male strippers in Tampa,
Florida, starring Channing Tatum (who also produced), this is a complete
waste of time exhibiting enough male pelvic thrusts to last several
lifetimes exacerbated by all the male dancers constantly grabbing
themselves.
Tatum is a
former male model who found acting, after working as a 19-year-old male
stripper, an experience upon which he based this film. He's worked a lot
in forgettable movies, except for 21 Jump Street, which I liked.
This one is so bad that it can't be termed "forgettable." Whenever I
think of horrible movies, I won't be able to forget it.
Technically,
director Steven Soderbergh must have saved money buying film stock
because the color is so washed out it could pass for black & white. The
audio is so bad I often yearned for subtitles.
It's peopled by
basically unknown actors, except for the two hunks, Tatum and Matthew
McConaughey, who seems to appear in every other movie produced this
year.
The "plot" (you
should pardon the expression) is that Mike (Tatum) takes 19-year-old
Adam (Alex Pettyfer) under his wing to bring him into the fold of the
male strip club owned by Dallas (McConaughey). In the process Mike
becomes involved with Paige Brooke (Cody Horn), Adam's sister. She's the
only character in the film who has a head that's screwed on right, which
makes her attraction for Mike all the more unbelievable.
If this is
intended to be character development, showing how Mike realizes the
vacuity of his life, something is seriously missing from the film. The
"plot" seems to be little more than feeble justification for a peep show
for women.
Soderbergh, who
has 34 films to his credit as a director, apparently forgot everything
he ever might have known about pace, because this thing meanders on and
on and on with no place to go, or even pass through.
The only
positive is that Horn gives a fine performance. I've only seen Tatum
play low-IQ types with a constant expression of bewilderment on his
face. He does that very well.
Maybe women like
seeing buff guys thrust their stuff in bikini bottoms, but I can't
imagine any straight guy being anything other than disgusted by this
film.
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