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		 Bride Wars (2/10) 
		by Tony Medley 
		90 minutes. 
		Not for children. 
		I started hating this movie after about 10 
		minutes when Liv (Kate Hudson) rushes into a room full of girls, 
		shouting “I’m engaged,” as if that was the only thing with which anyone 
		in the world was concerned. It went downhill from there. 
		Liv and Emma (Anne Hathaway) have been best 
		friends for life for 20 years. When they were young (I don’t know how 
		they could act any younger than they do at 26, but we’re talking 
		chronological age here), they saw a wedding at the Plaza Hotel and 
		decided that their life’s ambition was to get married at the Plaza. 
		They are both already living with their boy 
		friends and sleeping together, so why Liv should be so ecstatically 
		excited about “getting married” is somewhat puzzling. In more moral 
		times, living together was called “living in sin,” but now, in  
		Hollywood films, anyway, it’s
		de rigueur. 
		Lots of people do it and lots of people have babies born out of wedlock, 
		which causes all sorts of societal problems. I think that the fact that
		 Hollywood 
		films encourage this sort of activity is a big reason why it becomes 
		more and more prevalent. This ho-hum attitude towards sexual morality 
		that  Hollywood 
		imposes on its viewers is not without serious consequences. 
		 
		As to the men in this movie, they are little 
		more than afterthoughts, characters needed for the plot, but best 
		neither seen nor heard. Daniel (Steve Howey) is Liv’s live-in and Nate 
		(Bryan Greenberg) lives with Emma. 
		Forget the two leads.  
		Hudson has the most 
		beautiful smile in the business, but she has yet to see material that 
		tests her. For my money, Hathaway was the only part of “The Devil Wears 
		Prada” (2006) that didn’t hold up. She’s better here, but the material 
		is so dismal that it’s unfair to judge her. The only reasonable 
		performance is given by Candice Bergen, who plays the wedding planner, 
		Marion. Kristen Johnston, who plays Deb, a woman Emma deplores, but who 
		agrees to be her Maid of Honor is appropriately hateful and  
		Bergen is appropriately 
		over-bearing. But calling any performance in this film “best” is a 
		left-handed compliment, at, well, best. Candice does her best to carry 
		the film, but it's not nearly enough. 
		So Liv and Emma set their wedding dates, but 
		it turns out that they are identical. This causes them to hate one 
		another and pull all sorts of cruel stunts on one another. That two 
		people who were such good friends could be so cruel and hateful to one 
		another is more childish than humorous. 
		One of the big points of the film is a product 
		placement for Vera Wang wedding dresses. Vera should have seen the 
		script before she signed up for this. 
		I can’t believe that women in their 20s are 
		this insubstantial. Just as an example for how out to lunch this movie 
		is, is epitomized by Liv’s profession. She is represented as a real, 
		hard-as-nails attorney, a top negotiator. Yet when she’s presented the 
		wedding contract to sign with  
		Marion, she doesn’t read one 
		word. She just turns the pages until she gets to the signature page and 
		signs it. Yeah, that’s a real hardnosed attorney. Believe me, I was such 
		a hard nosed negotiator as a corporate attorney they called me Attila 
		the Hun. That was years ago. I still read everything anyone puts before 
		me to sign. That’s something that is so ingrained in any business 
		attorney that no matter how much she wanted to get married and have
		 Marion 
		represent her, she would still read the contract (and make lots of 
		changes). 
		Gary Winick directed “13 Going on 30” (2004), 
		a film that I found surprisingly entertaining. He’s going in the wrong 
		direction with this. 
		Greg DePaul has a “screenwriter, story by” 
		credit, but what does a man know about two women (at least that must be 
		what producer  Hudson 
		thought)? So Casey Wilson and June Diane Raphael, both best friends for 
		life, were brought in to bring this thing to its fruition as a 
		quintessential chick flick. Any man who likes this needs a series of 
		double dose shots of testosterone, along with a new brain. I find it 
		hard to believe that any woman would find it more enjoyable than 
		insulting. 
		  
		  
		
		January 8, 2009 
		  
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