Sex and the City (0/10)
by Tony Medley
What do “Sex and the City,”
ABC’s “The View,” and Fox News Channel’s “The O’Reilly Factor” have in
common? Give up? They are full of babbling, only occasionally coherent,
women. There is one big difference among them, though. “The View” and
“The O’Reilly Factor” end after an hour. “Sex and the City” drags on for
two entire hours plus an additional fifteen minutes. My watch never had
such a workout.
I missed the screening so
had to see this at an early afternoon showing in a theater with a real
audience. I was the only single heterosexual male there. The audience
was 98% female. The only other males were either gay or had been dragged
in by their female companions.
The same four ladies who
appeared in the TV series are here, Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica
Parker), Samantha Jones (Kim Cattrall), Charlotte York (Kristin Davis),
and Miranda Hobbes (Cynthia Nixon). Carrie has been living with Mr. Big
(Chris Noth) and they decide to get married. Miranda, an attorney, is
career-occupied has problems with her husband, Steve Brady (David
Eigenberg), with whom she has not had sex for six months. Steve is a
long-suffering wuss if there’s ever been one. Any man who would allow
himself to be treated like this and come crawling to her like he does
probably doesn’t need much sex with a woman.
Charlotte is Ms. Perfect.
Samantha is still a sex-starved vixen, who is living with some movie
star 20 years her junior in Malibu. She’s captivated by their next door
neighbor who only appears in the nude having sex with breast-joggling
bimbos in his all-windows abode. He even takes nude showers outside.
Yeah, that’s real realistic. Also appearing in kind of a cameo is
Candice Bergen who looks as if she could play tackle for the New York
Giants.
Noth, who was pretty
effective on TV’s “Law and Order,” gives a particularly wooden
performance. He appears about as enthusiastic about appearing in this
film as most men will be when they find themselves in a theater showing
the film.
I wasn’t a fan of the TV show. I saw it a couple of
times and thought it mildly entertaining, but not enough to watch again.
This movie, written and directed by Michael Patrick King, is much less
entertaining than the few segments of the TV show that I sat through.
It’s full of clichés, like the gay wedding planner (apparently a
holdover from the TV series). Gee, that’s real funny. Then there are
scenes of the ladies in Mexico. Charlotte is afraid to drink the water.
While taking a shower some water gets into her mouth apparently causing
her to get the runs. These constitute the apotheosis of the humor in
this film.
I was speaking with a lady
from the media before the screening who came from New York. She was
there to query men why they were there. I asked her if she was a fan of
the TV show. She said she saw it a few times, but she lived and worked
in New York and none of these women were typical New Yorkers. I had
perceived the series as being based upon unrealistic characterizations
of New York women, and women in general, so her opinion validated my
perception.
Let’s face it, do women in
New York really wear clothes like these four wear? Do they all walk
around in Jimmy Choo shoes with 4-inch high heels? On New York streets?
My sister lives part of the year in New York and she tells me that the
uniform de rigueur is black pants with various tops and
comfortable shoes, not all those gorgeous designer dresses and outfits
in which these four parade . Do they really sit around and cat drivel
like these four? Are New York women really this shallow? Far be it from
me to accuse Parker, who produced, and her writer-director King (who
also produced) as being sexist, but how else describe them when they
picture professional New York women as being this superficial,
self-centered, and lame-brained?
I can’t stop without
mentioning the product placement that is replete throughout this film.
It’s bad enough to pay top dollar to view something as bad as this, but
to be hit in the fact with virtual ads for Vogue Magazine, Louis Vuitton
(who died, incidentally, in 1892), and Apple Computer and others on top
of the terrible film is too much.
I could go on about the many things I didn’t like,
but why? Suffice it to say, this unfunny film as simply sheer fantasy,
about as realistic as “The Chronicles of Narnia,” but without the
special effects. Actually, instead of humorous, I found it to be dark
and depressing. The entire film is about Carrie trying to get over being
dumped at the altar by Mr. Big, and nice guy Steve debasing himself
trying to get back together with the cold, unattractive, selfish
Miranda. What’s funny about that?
May 30, 2008 |