Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (0/10)

by Tony Medley

I have seem some truly awful movies, and really didn’t believe that I had not seen the worst,  but I had not considered the existence of Will Ferrell, who continues his assault on comedy with this idiocy that is so bad it wouldn’t even appeal to nitwits. When I left the theater after viewing it I felt as if my intellect had been assaulted. I couldn’t have felt more exhausted had I gone 10 rounds with Muhammad Ali in his prime. It’s physically painful to have to sit in a theater for more than 90 minutes and be continually assaulted by such drivel as Ferrell puts on the screen. There is nothing good I can say about “Talladega Nights.”

The plot is too inane to even allude to, but I’ll try. Ricky Bobby (Ferrell) is an insanely stupid guy who remembers that his ne’er do well, drunken father said something idiotic, like, “if you don’t finish first, you’re a loser,” and lives the rest of his life according to that dictum, even though his father was a guy who had a one night stand with his mother in a women’s restroom and then split. Ricky Bobby becomes a race car driver, marries a groupie, and makes a lot of money. He has an accident, thinks he’s disabled, loses his nerve, and his wife leaves him for his best friend and Ricky Bobby hits the skids, ending up as a pizza salesman. His father reappears and comes up with some ridiculous philosophy that Ricky Bobby adopts and he becomes a winner again. End of movie.

All the characters in the movie are imbeciles. There is no premise. There is nothing funny. The trailer shows Ferrell running around the race track in his underpants. If you think that looks stupid, the rest of the film is actually dumber.

This is, I guess, meant as a satire. It is too obtuse to be anything, but it does epitomize the comedy career of its star. There are more Ferrell films coming up and I have to see them. Please keep me in your prayers.

August 5, 2006