After the Sunset (2/10)

by Tony Medley

Prospectively, this looks like it canít miss. With a cast of Pierce Brosnan and the voluptuous Selma Hayek, music by Lalo Schifrin, cinematography by multi-nominated Dante Spinotti, and a location in the Bahamas, what could go wrong? The answer begins and ends with the story by Paul Zbyscewski and the script by Zbyscewski and  Craig Rosenberg.

It starts out pretty good as Max Burdett (Brosnan) is a jewel thief who is living with his girl friend, Lola Cirillo (Hayek) after victimizing FBI agent Stan Lloyd (Harrelson) in stealing a big diamond at a Lakers basketball game.

They run away to hide in the Caribbean, ostensibly for Max to retire, but then Lloyd shows up and says he thinks theyíre going to steal another diamond thatís coming in on a cruise ship. They deny it.

As the story builds the first half hour isnít terrible. But then it all falls apart. The characters are paper m‚che, the story so predictable one wonders how anybody could foist it on an audience. The only thing that kept my attention was when Lola would bend over and the camera shot down her shirt to her navel. Thatís great cinematography! Sometimes the camera gets so close to her cleavage that I was wondering if they were using some sort of long lens, because I couldnít imagine the contortions involved in getting the camera that close. As you can tell by my wandering attention, the story was less than compelling.

Harrelson is truly an enigma. Heís in one terrible movie after another; he's always the same, couldn't display any other emotion than Woody Harrelson, the smiling sap, yet he keeps getting jobs. The only thing notable he ever accomplished was to get people to wear their baseball caps backward, thanks to one of his first terrible movies, master of the idiotic movie Ron Sheltonís White Men Canít Jump (1992). The only thing good about this is that when you see someone with his baseball cap on backward, you know instantly that youíre dealing with a dope.

Except for Lolaís cleavage and the Bahamian location, this movie is a waste.

November 6, 2004

The End

 

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